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Issue #157 - January/February 1998 |
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Midnight In The Rose Garden Of Good And Evil with Bill Clinton |
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Numbers of the Beast – YOU tell him they don't add up! |
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Promise Keepers Announce Groundbreaking New Bible Translation: Good News for Big Guys – Comes in a |
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special beer-and-Cheeto resistant Naugahyde cover! |
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Report of Independent Counsel Kenneth Starr – Wherein we tap into results of another undercover Door |
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investigation. by Robert Darden |
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Seven Years in Provo – Three Mormon movies you may have missed. by Skippy R. |
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Liturgical Line Dance Jubilee – And you were sick of the Macarena! by Ada M. Brown |
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Top Ten Things You Must Never, Ever (Really, We're Not Kidding About This---Promise Us You Won't) Say |
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at a Promise Keeper Rally – Notice: The Publishers are not responsible for the consequences if you do. |
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Southern Baptists Announce Shift to "Presidential Infallibility" and Formation of "College of Good Ol' Boys" |
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in Wake of Southern Seminary Librarian Firing |
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Worship – A reverent look at an ancient and beloved Sunday morning ritual. by Jean Lersch |
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The Door Talks Trash – He who steal my purse, steals trash…along with a fetching ensemble-look with faux |
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leather mauve boots. by Tim Ayers |
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Gag The Dog – Has the Southern Baptist Convention bitten off more than it can chew with this |
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uncompromising resolution? by Skippy R. |
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DOOR BOOK REVIEW: Single and Gloating – Hey! "Monogamy" and "monotony" have the same root words! |
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Classifieds – DM (Door Magazine) DS (desperately seeking) subscribers, Smoke-free and drug-free optional. |
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No games. by James Miller |
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Christians are from Mars Heathens are from Venus – Does that Mean most of the Door staff is from Uranus? |
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APA Journal Reviews – Separating the video wheat from the video chaff is a job for a wild man. by Brian |
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Anatomy of an Evangelist – A televangelist is a Christian created by a finance committee, a satellite, and a |
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building fund. by Craig McNair Wilson |
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American Family Association's Guide to the Bible – A very short guide… by Doug Duncan |
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A Groveling Apology To Our Readers |
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700 Club Productions - Coming Soon To A Theater Near You by Roberta Tucker Brosius |
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Top Ten Alternate Careers for Robert Tilton – Wherein we indulge in more gratuitous Tilton-bashing |
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involving John Gotti's evil twin brother. by Georgia Beaverson and Brian Kelcher |
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Gleanings from the Internet: Microsoft God – You mean Bill Gates isn't God?! |
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Signs and Wonders: Ever wonder what caused the first evangelical split? "Tastes Great" vs. "Less Filling" |
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Pastor, I sense that God is calling me to a ministry to the homeless. Do you have any of their addresses? |
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Disney's "Jesus" – The subliminals in this movie are going to be a DOOZY! by Cultural Jet Lag |
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A Sign of the End Times, "I'm looking for the Sandi Patty study bible" |
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(In Hell) "Remember…you're not bad people, you've just done bad things." |
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"Job, it says pass this chain letter along or have bad luck." Job: "Oh, just throw it away" |
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Lord, could you program my VCR? by Callahan |
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CORRECTIONS & CLARIFICATIONS |
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"A foolish consistency is the hob-goblin of little minds."—Emerson |
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Annoy your friends, enrage your enemies with these miniature masterpieces. |
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Hones Church Mottos by James W. Miller |
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The Door Guide to Sounding Cool by Meredith Gould |
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John Hannah – Selling your soul for relevance. by Trinity Foundation Editorial Board |
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Julia Sweeney – Ever heard of Saturday Night Live? Ever heard of Pat? Ever heard of God Said Ha! No? |
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Neither have we. by Arsenio Orteza |
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Ron Shelton by Rick Grant |
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Our readers rant and rave; our editors sweat and slave. |
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Pat Robertson – Don't hate me because I'm an arrogant multi-millionaire… by Skippy R. |
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We're still not making any of this stuff up. |
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Satire, a flat tire, and cold pancakes. by Ole Anthony |
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TRUTH IS STRANGER THAN FICTION |
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We're still not making any of this stuff up. |
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